WISFFL Wire #2

- Just as ground was being broken at a potential third field of play for the WISFFL last week, a team of girls' lacrosse players showed up to the ruin everything. After about 15 inquires answered by silent nods, WISFFL officials were able to determine that a practice was indeed being held. Thank God Jason Renda was not present.

- Defensive specialist Cara Bradley made her long-awaited debut last week. In fact, her presence on the field was so feared by opposing captain Matt Moore, that Moore brought in ringer Jeison Ortega to make his unannounced debut to shut down Bradley. Scouts are calling Ortega the most dominant line player they have ever seen.

- Meanwhile, scouts have dropped all interest in Sean Edwards after he failed to garner any attention in last weekend's NFL draft--not even the Washington Redskins. It is reported that Edwards was so upset that he could not make an appearance on the field during Week 3. He was last seen cavorting with Paulette Dean Daly.

- WISFFL leader in first-downs-repealed-by-penalty Matt Walsh has yet to make his WISFFL Season 2 debut. He has claimed that he has been working on his new apartment at home, and then made a statement he would be attending the Admin conference this week in Boston. However, reports out of England suggest the contrary, as Walsh is rumored to be wreaking havoc across the country dressed as a broke-ass Darth Vader.

- The WISFFL is prepared to sue quarterback Scott Priest if he attempts to breach his contract and interview for the head coaching position of the Dallas Mavericks. Several other WISFFL players were concerned yesterday as Priest was allegedly seen driving with an empty bottle of Grey Goose and and AK-47 while screaming about driving to New Jersey to find Maurice Ager.


Haiku
As requested by Laura
Nick Fox ditched his fans
Drunk in the Dominican
I can't write in verse


Week 4 INJURY REPORT
Las updated Thursday, May 1 at 7:30 p.m.

Out
Nick Fox

Questionable
Brandon MacKenzie (quad)
Sean Warnock (knees)

Probable
Alissa Nelson (Thumb)